Sara’s View of Life with Sara Troy, on air from May 18th
An honest talk around emotional fatigue, masking pain, burnout, and the liberation that comes from authenticity.
May is Fibromyalgia Awareness Month, and after living with fibromyalgia for over thirty years, I felt it was important to speak openly about the wearyness of living with a debilitating disease that so often goes unseen, misunderstood, or dismissed.
Fibromyalgia is not simply about pain. It is an exhaustion that settles deep into the bones, the muscles, the mind, and the spirit. It is waking up tired no matter how much sleep you have had. It is trying to function through brain fog, chronic fatigue, hypersensitivity, emotional depletion, digestive issues, and a body that can change from one moment to the next without warning. Some days, even the smallest tasks can feel like climbing a mountain carrying invisible weight.
What makes it even harder is that many people living with fibromyalgia become experts at masking it. We smile, show up, continue caring for others, continue working where we can, and continue trying to participate in life while silently calculating energy, pain levels, recovery time, and limitations. People often see the face we present, not the internal battle we fight every single day.
Living with a long-term illness also carries grief. Grief for the life you thought you would have, the energy you once had, the spontaneity lost, the misunderstandings from others, and sometimes even the isolation that comes from people not fully comprehending what chronic illness does to the body, mind, emotions, and identity.
But within that wearyness, there is also resilience. There is adaptation. There is courage in continuing on when your body constantly asks you to stop. There is wisdom learned through pacing, listening, adjusting, and discovering what truly matters. Living with fibromyalgia teaches compassion in ways many cannot understand unless they too have walked this path.
This conversation is not about seeking pity. It is about awareness, understanding, and giving voice to the millions of people who live daily with invisible illnesses. It is about acknowledging that behind many smiles are people carrying extraordinary burdens quietly and bravely.
And perhaps most importantly, it is about reminding those who live with fibromyalgia that they are not weak, not lazy, not imagining it, and not alone and you are so much more than the desease.
Self Discovery Wisdom is sustained by those who believe in conscious conversation. If this episode resonated with you, subscribe and, if you feel called, make a donation. Your support helps us keep amplifying voices that inspire growth, courage, and compassion. Thank you. Become an author on ouranthology Our Forgotten Seniors and help to bring this book to awareness.
Sara’s View of Life with Sara Troy. On air from April 14th
When the Mind, Body, and Processing All Speak at Once
ADHD, Fibromyalgia & Dyslexia — Different Expressions, Shared Sensitivity
We often look at conditions like ADHD, Fibromyalgia, and Dyslexia as separate challenges… but when we step back, we begin to see a deeper thread connecting them.
This is not about dysfunction. This is about a system that processes the world differently—more intensely, more deeply, and often all at once.
A Highly Responsive System
At the core of all three is a kind of heightened responsiveness:
ADHD the mind moves quickly, absorbing and reacting to multiple streams at once
Fibromyalgia the body amplifies sensations, especially pain and fatigue
Dyslexia the brain processes language and symbols in a non-linear, often more visual or intuitive way
Different expressions… same root: the system is taking in more than it can easily organize.
Fibromyalgia deep body awareness, empathy, sensitivity to others
Dyslexia visual thinking, problem-solving, storytelling, seeing patterns others miss
These are not small gifts. They are different intelligences.
What Support Truly Looks Like
Not fixing. Not forcing. Not comparing.
But:
Slowing things down
Allowing different ways of processing
Honouring rest without guilt
Creating calm, low-pressure environments
Speaking with encouragement instead of correction
And most of all: being seen without judgment
What It Feels Like (Bring Them Inside the Experience)
“Imagine your mind moving faster than you can organize… your body feeling more than it can process… and words not always landing the way you intend them to.
You are trying… deeply trying…but the world is moving in a rhythm that doesn’t match yours.”
Shift from judgment to empathy.
The Invisible Effort
People don’t often see how much effort it takes.
“What may look like distraction, fatigue, or confusion from the outside… is often someone working twice as hard just to stay present, to stay engaged, to stay understood.”
Reframe the narrative from “not trying” to “trying beyond what you see.”
The Masking Layer
Many people with ADHD, Fibromyalgia, and Dyslexia learn to mask:
pretending to keep up
hiding confusion
pushing through pain
overcompensating
“Sometimes the strongest people you meet… are the ones quietly holding it all together, so no one sees where they’re struggling.”
Language Matters (How We Speak to Them)
Instead of:
“Why can’t you just focus?”
“You need to try harder.”
Offer:
“How can I support you?”
“Take your time.”
“You don’t have to rush here.”
That shift alone can change someone’s entire nervous system response.
A Reframe
This fits with our “knowingness” philosophy:
“This isn’t a lack of ability…it’s a different wiring of brilliance.
When we stop forcing people into one way of functioning, we begin to see the depth of what they truly bring.”
A Closing Invitation
End it in your signature way inviting awareness and action:
“So today, I invite you to pause… to listen a little deeper… to offer a little more grace to others, and perhaps to yourself.
Because understanding isn’t about knowing everything… it’s about being willing to care.”
A Reflection
What if nothing about this is wrong… just different?
What if the mind, the body, and the way of learning are all asking for the same thing:
Space to breathe Permission to move at their own rhythm Understanding instead of expectation
Because when that happens…what once felt like struggle can begin to feel like self-awareness, alignment, and even wisdom.
Self Discovery Wisdom is sustained by those who believe in conscious conversation. If this episode resonated with you, subscribe and, if you feel called, make a donation. Your support helps us keep amplifying voices that inspire growth, courage, and compassion. Thank you.
Sara’s View of Life with Sara Troy. On air from April 14th
I thought I would take a tiny look back on my seven decades, and revisit the memories.
Age 20 – Stepping Into the World. The Decade 20–30: The Years That Made Me
There are decades in our lives that quietly pass… and then there are decades that shape us.
My twenties were not a gentle unfolding. They were a leap—into the unknown, into the world, and into myself.
At twenty, I didn’t step out with a clear plan or a mapped-out future. I stepped out with curiosity… with openness… and with a heart that believed in humanity.
And that, as I would come to learn, was both my gift… and my lesson.
The World Became My Teacher
I didn’t learn from books—I learned from life.
Travel opened doors that no classroom ever could. From Paris to Greece, from Italy to Spain, from the United States to the roots of my life in South Africa, each place gifted me something different… something I needed.
I discovered that no matter where we come from—our culture, our language, our beliefs—we are all seeking the same thing:
To love… to be loved… and to live a meaningful life.
There were moments that felt like magic.
Dancing on the steps of Montmartre in Paris, where music seemed to gather around me, people chanting my name, my friend capturing it in art form. It was as if the universe itself was orchestrating the moment… strangers becoming part of a shared joy, a collective rhythm.
Walking alone under the moonlight in Greece, a song rising from somewhere deep within me, only to be joined by a stranger whose voice met mine in harmony—two souls, unknown to each other, yet connected in that moment.
These were not just experiences… they were awakenings.
Love, Connection, and Being Seen
In Spain, I met a man who, for a time, truly saw me.
He didn’t try to fix me. He didn’t judge me. He simply held space for me—to be, to feel, to share.
And sometimes, even a brief love can leave a lasting imprint. Not because it lasted forever… but because, in that moment, it was real.
Those moments mattered.
They reminded me that connection was possible… even if it wasn’t always permanent.
I met my ex-husband when I was twenty-six. From the very beginning, it was tumultuous—there was trauma woven into it—but the attraction was addictive. I had never intended to marry. To me, being with someone was a choice made each day from the heart, not something bound by a piece of paper.
When I was twenty-eight, my daughter was born—she was deeply wanted and chosen. But the external pressure to marry became overwhelming, and so we did. We went on to have two more children.
Yet, it was a marriage that should never have happened, and the pain of it left lasting scars.
The Lessons That Come With Openness
But life has a way of balancing beauty with truth.
I trusted easily—because I believed in people.
And while that brought incredible souls into my life, it also brought lessons… sometimes hard ones.
Not everyone who enters your life is there to honor you.
Some come to take. Some come to teach. And some… come to wake you up.
There were moments of danger, moments of uncertainty—times when instinct had to lead because logic had no time to catch up.
Like the day I found myself lost in a part of Washington no one dared to go… and yet, through presence, connection, and a willingness to meet people eye to eye, fear dissolved into humanity.
Those experiences taught me something powerful:
When we lead with fear, we close doors. When we lead with presence, we sometimes open hearts.
Finding My Way Without Fitting In
I was never academic. That path was never mine.
But what I lacked in structure, I made up for in instinct.
I could walk into a room and feel what was needed. I could see what people couldn’t express. I could serve—not from training, but from knowing.
This got me every job I had, not my credentials, but my essence of being.
Whether working in restaurants or stepping into roles I technically wasn’t “qualified” for, I found my way by connecting with people.
I worked in many jobs, not for a career, but for an experience and to see if I could do it.
I became South Africa’s first female Mobile Oil representative—not because I knew oil… but because I knew people.
And that mattered more.
I realized that service isn’t about knowledge alone… it’s about understanding, presence, and care.
Expression, Joy, and Being Alive
There was joy too—so much joy.
Music, dance, movement… the freedom of expression. Discovery, meeting new people, experiencing things I had never done, tasted, and seen.
I became South Africa’s first official go-go dancer, at the age of 15, at a time when it was still vibrant and alive, before it took on darker connotations. This was the start of my exploration and setting me up to what I do today.
The rhythm of Africa…is in its soul its soil, the beat of music… the energy of the dance floor…
That was life moving through me.
Even when my body struggled—with asthma, with limitations—my spirit still danced.
The Awakening of Knowingness
Through all of this, something deeper was quietly growing within me.
A knowingness.
Not learned. Not taught. But felt.
I began to see that I could sense what others needed… that I could understand things without knowing how I knew.
At the time, I didn’t fully trust it.
I was still looking outward for validation… still trying to fit into a world that was never designed for someone like me. Dyslexia, ADD, Asthma, Eczema, and insecurity.
But the seed was there.
And it was growing.
The Decade That Built Me
Looking back now, I can see it clearly.
My twenties were not about getting it right.
They were about experiencing… exploring… falling… rising…
They were about becoming.
Every high lifted me. Every low shaped me. Every person, every place, every moment—left its imprint.
And through it all…
I was being prepared.
For Anyone Walking Their Twenties Now
If you are in this decade of your life, or remembering it…
Know this:
You are not meant to have it all figured out.
You are meant to live it.
To explore the world… to explore yourself… to make mistakes… to discover your strength…
Because this decade?
It doesn’t define you.
It builds you.
Closing Reflection
My twenties were messy, magical, painful, and beautiful. I got married, had my first child, moved yet again to a new country, traveled explored.
Self Discovery Wisdom is sustained by those who believe in conscious conversation. If this episode resonated with you, subscribe and, if you feel called, make a donation. Your support helps us keep amplifying voices that inspire growth, courage, and compassion. Thank you. Please support Our Forgotten Seniorsanthology and help to bring this book to awareness.
Building Your Business with Sara Troy and her guest Hank Eder, on air from January 13th
Do Your Brand and Website Speak To Those You Serve, Or Is It All About You?
These days we hear a lot of talk about authenticity. It’s a cornerstone of trust. Of the big three, “know, like, and trust,” trust is the most important. Without it, the others don’t matter. What about your website? Do you come across authentically, but even more importantly, is it aimed at those you serve, rather than being all about yourself?
Hank Eder began his career as a news reporter, and over nearly five decades gained experience in graphics design, advertising, marketing and public relations. When he approached 40, he wanted to “give back,” and spent 13 years teaching print and broadcast journalism in public schools both in South Florida and North Carolina. When he left the school system, he went back to his roots and started his current “incarnation” in 2011. Having worn all the hats over the years, he now is chief instigator at Hank Eder Branding, Marketing, and Web Design, a “one-stop shop,” specializing in customer-driven branded content writing to demonstrate clearly how you serve your target audience with authenticity.
Sisterhood of Common Sense Love with Sara Troy and her guest Ande Lyons, on air from December 23rd
How to Thrive After 65
My “why” behind Don’t Be Caged By Your Age is simple and deeply personal: I want to dissolve the outdated, limiting narratives that tell us our worth, relevance, or potential diminishes with time. After 65, we are not winding down, we are expanding out. This podcast is my love letter to possibility, a place where stories, wisdom, and lived experience remind us that thriving isn’t reserved for the young; it’s available to all of us, right now. I want listeners to feel seen, supported, and inspired to pursue whatever lights them up, because aging isn’t a cage, it’s an invitation to keep becoming.
At 69 Ande Lyons is a 4x founder, a former global startup mentor, serial podcaster since 2012, founder of the New England Podcasters Group, a monthly in-person event for podcasters, and host of the popular interview-style pro-aging podcast Don’t Be Caged By Your Age, where Ande shatters age-related expectations, helps folks dissolve internalized ageist beliefs, and provides resources, inspiration and ideas so older adults can thrive after 65.
All of our shows/interviews are done by donation; if you enjoyed this show, please support us here with either a one-time donation or subscribe and support. Thank you. Please support Our Forgotten Seniorsanthology and help to bring this book to awareness.
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