Their Story Matters with Sara Troy and her guest Michael Roberts, on air from March 8th
Michael Roberts, author of the new memoir Behind Sacred Walls: The True Story of My Abuse by Catholic Priests. In an interview, Michael will talk about navigating his sexuality as a gay man — prior to, during, and after the abuse.
Throughout his childhood and teenage years, religion played an important role in Michael’s life. Growing up within a Catholic family in an all-American small town, not only informed his belief system but created the perfect conditions for him to be groomed and later abused by several priests. The added layers of religious shame and the fear of his family finding out that he was homosexual were factors in the physical and psychological abuse he suffered at the hands of priests. His nearly ten years of abuse took place under the eye of the Catholic Church, as was the institutionalized cover-up by high members of the Church.
Roberts fought alone against this centuries-old, untouchable institution in search of some form of repair and control over his destiny. He completed his college education, graduating from a prestigious university with a bachelor’s degree in Biological Science. His new book, Behind Sacred Walls, is a cathartic, cautionary tale about blind faith, broken trust, and the loss of innocence of a young man trying to survive deep betrayal and trauma.
Michael Roberts has worked as an environmental technician and as a sales and marketing manager for a biotech company that makes implements to pharmaceutical research to develop drugs. Prior to this, Micahel worked as a professional model in Paris, Rome, and the United States. He has appeared in television commercials and numerous print ads and catalogs, as well as runway shows. Michael is married to his partner, Johnathan, with whom he enjoys traveling around the world. His future plans include volunteer work in wildlife conservation to help save endangered species.
Their Story Matters with Sara Troy and her guests Kenny Xu, on air February 15th
From a journalist on the frontlines of the Students for Fair Admission (SFFA) v. Harvard case comes a probing examination of affirmative action, the false narrative of American meritocracy, and the attack on Asian American excellence with its far-reaching implications?from seedy test-prep centers to gleaming gifted-and-talented magnet schools, to top colleges and elite business, media, and political positions across America
The Asian American minority, transcending its impoverished history, has quietly assumed mastery of the nation’s technical and intellectual machinery and become essential to the workforce that makes modern American life possible. Yet, they’ve been forced to do so in the face of policy proposals?written in the name of diversity?that serve to exclude them from the upper ranks of the elite.
In An Inconvenient Minority, journalist Kenny Xu, who has covered the sensational Students for Fair Admission (SFFA) v. Harvard case since its inception, traces elite America’s longstanding unease about a minority potentially upending them in the race for group status. Their policy proposals, such as eliminating standardized testing, doling out racial preferences to non-Asian minorities, inflaming anti-Asian stereotypes, and lumping Asians into “privileged” categories despite their deprived historical experiences have forced Asian Americans to fight back?a battle given a boots-on-the-ground perspective here.
Going beyond the Harvard case, Xu unearths the skewed logic that has had ripple effects throughout the US, from Mayor Bill de Blasio’s attempted makeover of the New York City Specialized School programs to the battle over diversity quotas in Google’s and Facebook’s progressive epicenters to the rise of Asian American political activism in response to unfair perceptions and admission practices.
For too long, Asian Americans have stood in the shadows, operating the machinery in the back. But their time is now. An Inconvenient Minority chronicles the political and economic repression and renaissance of a long-ignored racial identity group?and how they are central to reversing America’s cultural decline and preserving the dynamism of the free world.
Kenny Xu is the lead insider on the Harvard case and a commentary writer for The Federalist, The Washington Examiner, The Daily Signal, and Quillette. Xu has spoken on the consequences of the Harvard case and its identity politics ideology in front of groups as diverse as the nationally renowned Pacific Legal Foundation to the Boston Rally for Education Rights to the all-Black Connecticut Parents Union. His commentary has propelled him to interviews with NPR and features in the New York Times Magazine. He lives in Washington, DC.
Mental Health Awareness with Sara Troy and her guest Lara Sabanosh, on-air from February 8th
Lara M. Sabanosh, author of the new memoir CAGED: The True Story of Abuse, Betrayal, and GTMO. The wall of silence surrounding domestic abuse in the military and in the government is a high one. In her memoir, Lara talks about the secrecy, fear, and despair of being in an abusive relationship, and hopes her story can be used to change a faulted system.
A searing memoir from the widow of former Marine, Christopher Tur—setting the record straight and breaking through the military’s wall of silence surrounding domestic abuse
On January 11, 2015, one day after being reported missing and three days after he was last seen by his family, Christopher Tur, a former Marine working as a civilian employee at Guantanamo Bay Naval Station in Cuba, was found dead, floating in the water near the base. Over the months following his mysterious death, suspicion was cast on his widow, Lara, and the man exposed as her lover: the base’s commanding officer, Captain J.R. Nettleton.
In CAGED: The True Story of Abuse, Betrayal, and GTMO Lara M. Sabanosh (formerly Lara Tur) speaks out about what really happened on that horrific night her husband disappeared—and throughout most of their nearly 20-year marriage—as well as her relationship with J.R. Nettleton. Writing from the perspective of both a victim and a victim advocate serving Navy families, she also makes an impassioned plea for change in the way domestic violence is handled within the military and government. “The civilian spouse, the government employee, is not a protected individual,” Sabanosh stresses. “Victims are punished in our current system.”
Lara first met Chris Tur in the winter of 1994. At the time, she was a college sophomore and barely 19. A six-foot-tall Marine full of bravado, Chris swept her off her feet. In December 1995, they were married and she was pregnant. Early on, Lara dismissed the red flags—Chris’s cruel jokes, erratic actions, excessive partying, and strained relationship with his family. A dishonorable military discharge, DUIs, and job losses followed, along with rages of increasing intensity and mounting secrets and lies. In the winter of 2010, Chris shared an employment possibility overseas. After battling loneliness, depression, and fear, and with two daughters to raise, Lara jumped on board, hoping for a fresh start at Guantanamo Bay Naval Station.
In CAGED, Lara Sabanosh recounts how she came into her own at GTMO, finding work she loved and quickly rising to a director role at the Fleet and Family Support Center. With this new career and a newfound self-confidence, Lara found the confidence to face Chris and his outbursts while standing on her two feet, no longer cowering to the abusive tirades. It seemed like they might be able to stay together and live separate lives—until Chris became jealous of Lara’s friendships, particularly with the “CO,” Captain Nettleton. At age 39, Lara had endured two decades with an abusive spouse. Over the years, a number of people had witnessed Chris’s verbal, emotional, and physical abuse toward her. People had heard him call her ugly, stupid, lazy, and worse. People had seen him slap her in the face, slamming her fingers in doors, pulling her hair, and choking her. People had peered at the holes in their walls, pretended not to see her bruises, and listened to his excuses. What happened on the last night of Christopher Tur’s life was not all that different: no one responded when she asked for help.
“Abuse within the military and government is a silent epidemic.” Sabanosh writes. “Domestic violence support should be available to all members of the military, government, and their dependents without the worry of reprisal, without having to fit into ‘someone’s’ quotas for criteria, without the worry of rank, and without issue about whom anyone works for. Program changes need to be made for the safety of those who sacrifice for our country… No one should wait to report abuse. No one should fear freedom. There should be no more cages.”
LARA M. SABANOSH spent much of her adult life as a wife, mother, and student, eventually completing two doctoral degrees. She is currently retired from government service, residing quietly in Pensacola, Florida, surrounded by her loving family, dogs, and grand puppies.
Their Story Matters, with Sara Troy and her guest Kevin Ringstaff, on air from January 18th
Kevin Ringstaff has been a student of grief for many years. He creates products and activities on grief and invents ways to help teach grief to everyone. Kevin’s been through several grief certification programs over the years and he’s currently studying to be a Board Certified Hospital Chaplain. He spends his days talking about grief, creating activities and products around grief, and listening to the stories from people all over the country.
He founded his first company, PetCloud (www.petcloud.pet) to help those who are going through the loss of a pet, and his second company, Grieving@Work (www.grievingatwork.com) to teach management how to better support grieving employees in the workplace.
His life is currently graced and occupied by 3 pets, his Old English Sheepdog, Sir William Broderick (“Brody”), his cat Ponce de León (“Ponce”), and a Tarantula that he accidentally came into possession of, Lucy.
My name is Kevin Ringstaff, and I am the founder of PetCloud. I spend my days talking about grief and educating people on how to support their friends, family, and co-workers through their grief. Mostly though, my daily job is to listen to the stories of love and loss by other people.
I recently moved to San Francisco to build and grow this community into a place where anyone, anywhere can come and share their grief and get support from others who really do understand the pain and anguish we go through when we lose someone we love.
Through my studies and counseling over the years, I’ve learned quite a lot about grief. It’s safe to say that as a society, we all have a tendency to hold on to grief. It’s awkward and uncomfortable to talk about. We feel like we might be judged especially if we tell other people how much we are hurting because of our losses.
I got into this business because of a loss of my own, Henry “Fats” Rothschild “Henry”, who was my furry orange monstrosity of a cat. When I lost him, I didn’t have anyone in my life that I really felt comfortable talking with about that kind of grief. So, as I did with most grief in my life, I just pushed it down and held it in. I went on like this for a long time until I found out about the Association for Pet Loss & Bereavement (www.aplb.org), started by Dr. Wallace Sife. I got certified as a pet loss bereavement counselor through their program, and I’ve been helping people ever since.
Since that time, I’ve gone on to become a registered Pet Chaplain and a certified Grief Recovery Specialist ®, and now I’m in school again to be a Board Certified Chaplain. I’m always reading and studying more about grief and looking to speak to anyone who will listen.
Their Story Matters with Sara Troy and her guest Ann Silvers, on air from January 11th
Men can be on the receiving end of an abusive relationship! It could be from an emotionally abusive girlfriend, a physically abusive wife, or a female partner who is demanding, controlling, manipulative or bullying using any of the 7 forms of partner or spousal abuse.
This groundbreaking book shatters the silence surrounding partner abuse where the target of the abuse is a man, and the source of the abuse is a woman. It challenges the common perception that domestic violence and other types of partner abuse only happen to women.
Counselor and relationship coach, Ann Silvers, M.A., questions the cultural trend to ignore, condone, laugh at, or even applaud women treating men in ways that would be rightfully condemned if the genders were reversed.
Her unique perspective as a woman who herself was the target of partner abuse by a man, and who also recognizes that there are abusive women and abused men, has resulted in a book that is a cultural game changer.
This book stands alone with its gripping personal stories and detailed yet concise descriptions of emotionally abused men as well as every other form of partner abuse of men by their female partners: verbal, psychological/emotional, financial, spiritual, legal, physical, and sexual abuse.
“It Happens, It Hurts” describes what abuse OF men BY women looks like, why women do it, how we are supporting and encouraging women to abuse men, how men get pulled into these dysfunctional relationships, why they stay, the impact abusive or manipulative women have on men, and what can be done about it.
This book arms men with the information they need to avoid getting hooked into relationships with abusive or manipulative women.
It provides refreshing recognition, understanding, and direction for abused men who are struggling to deal with, or recover from, difficult relationships with an abusive wife or girlfriend.
And it helps women examine how they treat their husbands and boyfriends.
“It Happens, It Hurts” is a road map for men and women looking to help their brothers, fathers, sons, and friends who are being abused by women or teach them how to avoid getting pulled in by them. It is a call to action for helping professionals (teachers, counselors, ministers, police officers . . .) and all people who are willing to see what is really going on.
Ann Silvers, MA is a counselor, relationship coach, and author living in Washington State, US. She has been educated in the subject of partner abuse through academic study; personal experience being the target of abuse by a partner; and by talking to and working with many women and men who are abused by, and/or are abusing, their partner. She is concerned about the welfare of both women and men and focuses her work on helping people have healthy relationships with others and with themselves.
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